In the midst of the battle trying all I can and withholding myself from all the temptations and cravings .... I feel like I was robbed of hope! I have never been a big weight loser. I would loose a few kilograms and then pick it all up with more. Loosing weight often is a VERY SLOW and painful process for me. Even giving it my best effort..... IT GOES SLOW!
I have the incredible gift to pick up weight :) You know what I mean..... One bite or one meal could throw me back for days standing still or picking up on the scale.
I become tiered of trying.... hoping and bearing forward. I turn myself to COMPARING... Comparing myself with people I know that can eat all they want and not pick up a gram. Someone smilingly talking about how fast her metabolism is and how she can easily loose a few kilograms a week with little effort..... it can draw me into the ugly place of WHY ME questions....
Comparison steals hope! It steals vision and the energy to bear forward in hope. Acknowledging that I have compared myself feels like the battle half won. It brings light into the dark tunnel of loosing perspective and wondering if I can do it.
Recently on holiday while my family was gobbling down spoonfuls of ice cream and caramel sauce and I was just sitting there sipping my coffee my daughter noted that it must be hard for watching them eat all they like and want. "Yes it is! But I believe I'm learning valuable lessons in my character.... to be content with what I have and learning to endure when I feel like giving up. It makes me stronger..... Teaching me to be able to say no....." I thoughtfully answered.
After our conversation I found a quiet spot in our home and made peace in my heart with my situation and weight loss struggles again.... I made a decision not to allow comparison to steal my hope. Putting my heart and mind together to walk this narrow path... baring forward against all odds.
Yes there is a price to pay a price to choose to tackle the challenge head on, to endure in hope. This tortoise will eventually cross the finish line smiling!
YOU CAN TOO!
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